


Can we pretend that airplanes in the night sky are like shooting stars?

by Del (goddessdel)



Category: Doctor Who & Related Fandoms, Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: Childhood Memories, Gen, Mother-Daughter Relationship, Reflection, Time Babies
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-08
Updated: 2018-07-08
Packaged: 2019-06-07 08:39:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 904
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15215297
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/goddessdel/pseuds/Del
Summary: Amy, River, and Bill reflect on memories and mothers. A series of connected drabbles in three parts.





	1. Amy

**Author's Note:**

> Written: 6-19-17 - 12-2-17
> 
> Title from: "Airplanes" by B.o.B. 
> 
> I've been debating posting vs expanding this for a while, but here it is.

She doesn't remember her mum, not really. She doesn't remember either of her parents, but it's her mum she misses the most when Aunt Sharon shouts or forgets to pick her up at school or sends her to four psychiatrists.

 

It's her mum's voice she sometimes thinks she hears but can never really remember the sound of, just a sense that she was loved, once.

 

Her mum's voice that she imagines soothing her back to sleep when the she wakes in the middle of the night to monsters on the other side of the crack in her wall.

 

Her mum she imagines kissing her scraped knees better and complaining about her choices in boyfriends and crying on her wedding day.

 

But her mum never comes, and the voices in the wall fade into the background, and Aunt Sharon continues to burn supper.

 

So Amy Pond waits and she never really stops.


	2. River (I)

When she was still Melody, she didn't remember her mum, not really. She didn't remember either of her parents, but there was a picture of a ginger woman her keepers said was her mother in her little room at the orphanage and, if she tried to remember really, _really_ hard, sometimes she thought she recalled being the baby wrapped safe and warm in her mother's arms.

 

Sometimes she even thought she could remember her mother's voice, telling her to be brave and something about her father and Romans and that she would be rescued.

 

Her mother's voice that she imagined soothing her back to sleep when the she woke in the middle of the night to monsters and spacemen coming to get her, or when she was too lonely and frightened to sleep at all.

 

But the memories were hazy and faded and she couldn't focus when her keepers were near, and so she decided to rescue herself.

 

She never was any good at waiting. But _brave_ \- she could be very, very brave.

 

So Melody Pond ran and she never really stopped.


	3. River (II)

When she was Mels, it was hard to remember that she had parents at all. Stood right next to Amy - to her _mum_ \- and she had never felt more of an orphan.

 

They were her family and her friends, but it was never quite the same as having proper parents, the way both of them did, the way normal humans did.

 

She couldn't imagine her mum kissing her scraped knees better or crying on the wedding day she'd never live long enough to have, though Amy and Rory certainly complained enough about her choices in boyfriends.

 

No - all she had were keepers and friends.

 

But every once in a while, Amy would put on her most serious voice and Mels would almost remember warm arms and fierce determination and ' _what you are going to be, Melody, is very, very brave'_.

 

The memory flickered, like something just out of the corner of her eye, and then it would sputter and fade and there she would be - Mels Zucker - the alien, the orphan - and it hardly seemed to matter if her best friends were her parents or not because she'd never be that safe and loved again.

 

So Mels Zucker ran and she never really stopped.


	4. River (III)

River Song's memories of her parents aren't quite what anyone would call normal. She remembers late night sleep-overs up giggling with her mum about boys, helping her dad revise for exams, attending her parents' wedding.

 

It's been lifetimes since she was a little girl so briefly in their arms, and she can no longer remember what it feels like to have parents. She loves Amy and Rory - truly, she does - but it's all timey-wimey, like everything in her life, and it's not quite the same as having real parents.

 

Especially when they don't know they're her parents for over half her life.

 

Especially when they jump into a paradox and blink out of existence soon after.

 

So River Song convinces herself that she doesn't need parents or parenting, not really. That she doesn't wish she'd had a chance to properly say goodbye, or a chance to be properly raised in the first place.

 

And she runs, and she never really stops.


	5. Bill

She doesn't remember her mum, not really. She doesn't remember either of her parents, but it's her mum she misses the most when Moira shouts or forgets to pick her up at school or is out with yet another boyfriend.

 

It's her mum's voice she sometimes thinks she hears but can never really remember the sound of, just a sense that she was loved, once. And something about Last Centurions.

 

There are no pictures of her mum, no stories or anecdotes or family friends to question, so she makes up her own mum in her head as she goes along, hoping against hope that maybe it was all a mistake - maybe one day she'll find her.

 

Her mum's wise anecdotes that she imagines soothing her back to sleep when the she wakes in the middle of the night at yet another foster home and doesn't remember where she is.

 

Her mum she imagines kissing her scraped knees better and reassuring her that it's all right she likes girls and crying on her wedding day.

 

But her mum never comes, and she can never really remember her voice anyway, and Moira continues to have rubbish taste in men.

 

So Bill Potts searches and she never really stops.

 

**Author's Note:**

> I remain firmly convinced that Bill could totally be a Time!Baby. /Not sorry.


End file.
